


Gemtaker

by goldeaglefire1



Category: Helltaker (Video Game), Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alive Rose Quartz, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Crossover, Hell, I swear if I write more than one chapter of this it will mostly be funnies with a side of plot, Sort Of, do not let the intro fool you this is primarily a funny fic, quarantine has given me too much power
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:08:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24592786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldeaglefire1/pseuds/goldeaglefire1
Summary: Rose Quartz had never really thought that hard about the human concept of the afterlife - after all, Gems could never really die. Why would she have to worry about what happened afterwards?Well, as it turns out, not only is the afterlife real, Gems can, in fact, go to hell. She's proof, after all.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 40





	Gemtaker

Something was wrong.

Something was wrong, it _had_ to be. Everything had been going so well before - she’d felt a pleasant warmth fall over her as her form began to melt away, her consciousness being overwritten by something wondrously new, the life inside her finally coming to fruition...and then there was that pull.

It was as if her very gem had been pierced by cold, hooking deep into her core and filling her with pain beyond which she had ever known. And then it started to drag her down, forcing her away from that warmth and into...well, she didn’t quite know _what,_ all she knew was that it felt like she was a human being dragged across a field of barbed wire.

Had the other Gems noticed? Was she even expressing her pain? She hoped little Steven was okay; she’d heard of what humans called “miscarriages,” she didn’t know how she’d be able to handle it if all that promise had gone to waste.

...Was this what was _supposed_ to happen? It could be, as far as she was aware. She was the first Gem to give up her form like this, after all; there was no precedent for _birth._ She’d never heard of any human going through pain quite like...well, she did, actually, but Steven’s way of birth was quite different from that of a normal human, so she shouldn’t be going through that kind of pain...or still be aware of it, for that matter.

She’d said it herself - she and Steven couldn’t both exist. And he should’ve overridden her by now. So why-

**_Snap._ **

And just like that, the pain was gone. Everything was gone, for that matter. All that was around her was a great, gaping void as far as her eyes could see..no, that wasn’t quite right. She didn’t have eyes. Or a body, for that matter. There wasn’t even the familiar comfort of her gem - just emptiness. It felt like she was a...what was the word humans used for it? A “ghost?” She’d found the concept rather silly when she first heard of it all those centuries ago, likening it to Pearl’s holograms (much to Pearl’s denial), but now she hardly found it humorous.

…

…

…

What was that buzzing?

She didn’t quite hear it at first. The source was apparently quite small (she guessed; she couldn’t exactly turn her head to see it); hardly noticeable, really. But then there was another. And another. In a matter of moments, it seemed like there was a swarm of the things, closing in just out of sight and filling her ears with white noise. It was _maddening -_ she couldn’t see what they were, she couldn’t move to cover her ears or run away, couldn’t cry out for them to stop...all she could do was stare into the blackness as the buzzing filled her ears.

Then, something cut into the endless noise.

 _“You know, I have to thank you,”_ A voice that was somehow both a deep, grumbling rasp and a high-pitched whisper wormed its way into her mind, cutting through all her distractions and demanding her attention. _“You have provided me with a_ **_very_ ** _interesting opportunity, Rose Quartz.”_

She would’ve flinched if she could. The voice may have been unfamiliar, but the tone, the _power..._ memories she’d thought had been long buried were suddenly pulled to the surface - countless nights spent locked away crying in her tower, the dread that filled her when she had to see that white glow, _pink draining away to white -_ and she felt the urge to run, to hide, anything to get away from that voice-

But she had no body to run away with.

Horrible, horrible laughter boomed through the void, the buzzing growing all-consuming as it did. _“A leader of a species with no concept of the afterlife, and you already know not to trust me? Really, I might have been impressed if you had a choice.”_

She felt a massive presence loom over her, and shivers wracked what form she had. Once again, her instincts flared, telling her to _get away_ from that thing, that anywhere in this massive void would’ve been better than being near that, and if she had legs to run away with, she absolutely would have.

 _“Do you know how difficult it is to pull one over ol’ Lucy?”_ The voice suddenly asked, speaking to her as if she was an old friend. Somehow, that felt worse than when it was talking down to her. _“It’s hard enough to intercept the passage of a soul - it’s_ **_worse_ ** _when she has an entire department dedicated to estimating the arrival time of a soul, putting me on a time limit! Because if they arrive more than a few seconds past when they were supposed to,_ fwoosh. _Into the pit they go. And even then, Lucy knows how to recognize my taint on humans, so even when they arrive on time, they’re thrown into the pit regardless. It’s been practically impossible for me to plant an agent when they monitor humans so closely…”_

 _“But you know what they don’t track?”_ She felt a gust of hot air brush past her, the smell of rot and decay coming with it, and suddenly found that she much preferred the cold. If the voice noticed, it clearly didn’t care. _“Gems. Because quite frankly, they don’t see the point. Stabbed, crushed, maimed, corrupted, shattered...nothing works on you. Not really. If there’s one thing you Gems can’t seem to do, it’s_ **_die.”_ **

A couple of sickening cracks sounded out from behind her, and she got the sinking feeling that now it was _grinning._ _“Fitting how you’d be the one to solve that little issue, isn’t it?”_

She hadn’t felt this much dread in quite a while. Not since the war, not since she permanently forsook her status as a Diamond, not since she still lived on Homeworld. She wanted to see how the other Gems were doing. Was Steven okay? How was Pearl handling it? How was Greg handling it, for that matter? She really hoped they were all doing better than her right now. Anything would be better than this.

 _“Now, as tempting as it is to just keep talking to my captive audience…”_ Something about that gave her pause. There was a difference in the voice that time, a more somber tone. But before she could reflect on that, it continued. _“I do have a schedule to keep. Abysses to escape, CEOs to overthrow - you know how it is. So how about we get you a proper body, hm?”_

For the first time since she got here, she saw something other than endless darkness: a massive, three fingered hand reaching out from behind her, covered in red chitin, with each finger ending in a white claw as sharp as her sword. It wasn’t as big as White’s hand, or even Blue and Yellow’s, but it was bigger than that of Alexandrite, she was certain.

With surprising delicacy, it grabbed at the darkness and gently pulled, forming it like putty. Within moments, the hand had within its claws a perfectly cut black quartz, its pentagon facet giving off a brilliant shine as the hand pulled back a little bit to let the voice examine its handiwork. After another moment, it lightly tapped the gem in the center with one of its claws, and, much to her surprise, the gem turned pink.

A Rose Quartz.

 _“Ah, one of my better works, I’d say,”_ The voice idly remarked, fiddling with the gem in its claws to show it off. _“Sure, it’s nothing compared to my palace, but I’ve had millenia to work with that. I did this in less than a minute. Wouldn’t you say it’s lovely? I think it’s perfect for you - an ideal gem for the ideal paragon. The escape you always wanted. That’s why you wanted a son in the first place, isn’t it?”_

Escape.

That sounded...that was _wrong._

She didn’t give up her form to _escape._ No matter what she did, her actions would always haunt her, she _knew_ that. What she wanted was _change,_ the ability to _grow,_ like a Gem never could...like she never could. She wanted to make something new, something that could be free from her mistakes and genuinely become as wonderful as the Gems thought she was. She wasn’t in this for an out, and she wasn’t going to accept one now.

For a few moments, the voice was silent, leaving only the buzzing. Oh, right, it could hear her, or something along those lines. _“...not quite the reaction I was expecting. Are you certain you don’t want this?”_

The hand held out that Rose Quartz for a few more moments, as if to make sure, and then another hand filled her view, grabbing another end of the gem and beginning to _stretch._ _“Like I said, they don’t watch Gems. They don’t know your secret - I only watched because I had nothing better to do. If you were to show up as a true Rose Quartz, no one would question it. But if you showed up as you were in life, and you were to poof…”_

The hand held out the newly-formed Diamond.

 _“Everyone down there knows who Pink Diamond is. And none of them would be very happy to find out the truth.”_ The voice rumbled, snapping the claws of its free hand together in a pinching motion.

Once again, dread filled her form. She thought of the battlefield, and how many times Pearl had thrown herself in the path of an incoming blade, or hammer, or club, of the Breaking Point, of nights spent staring at the stars, wondering if they’d ever accept her if she knew who she was. And yet, she pushed all that aside. She’d kept her identity secret for thousands of years. She could handle this.

 _“Very well. I suppose this makes for a more interesting story, anyway.”_ Before she could think too hard about what that meant, the point of the Diamond was turned towards her, the arm _plunged_ downwards-

And she let out a gasp as cold filled her being, leaving her with a light chill as feeling returned to her body.

Body. She had one again.

She held out her hands, flexing her fingers and staring in awe at the perfect recreation. Then her eyes narrowed. Putting a hand to her stomach, she summoned her shield, turned around with a fierce scowl...and froze like a statue.

It was a massive, bloated creature, nearly every inch covered in red and black chitin, and what wasn’t was either covered with bulging pink pustules or a hole in the armor. Its six arms idly flexed their claws while frayed wings idly twitched, and the creature peered down at her with porous growths resembling insectoid eyes. And now she finally knew what that buzzing was - _flies._ More flies than she had ever seen in her time on Earth, hanging around the beast like a cloud and pouring out of the various holes in its body like a waterfall.

 _“Now, I know I may be irresistible,”_ The beast started, casually plucking her shield right off her arm and crushing it between two hands. _“But it’s time for you to go play your part.”_

With unnatural swiftness, it grabbed her by the legs, forcing her to stay still as it lowered one of its hands down to her face, one claw over the other as if it was ready to...flick something away? _“By the way, you’re not going to remember any of this. Sorry, just a precaution.”_

**_SMACK!_ **

* * *

“...similar, but doesn’t quite match human muscle structure...I suppose that makes sense, they may be humanoid, but they’re made of light; they don’t exactly have to worry about-”

Rose Quartz groaned as consciousness sluggishly returned to her, blinking away the darkness and squinting as she looked up at the ceiling. Craggy red rock, reminding her a bit of the burning room. Then Rose realized that her left arm was slightly elevated, and she slowly turned her head over, still squinting a bit.

What Rose saw was what appeared to be a black-haired, blue-eyed young human woman dressed in a white and gold uniform, holding up her arm and feeling what would be her bicep. More unusual was the glowing ring floating above her head, reminding Rose of...what did humans call them? “Angels”? Yes, that sounded right. The young woman was also sweating up a storm, staring at Rose with wide eyes and a slight shake in her grip.

“Hello?” Rose gave the woman a smile, waving with her free arm.

Almost immediately, the woman dropped the arm like a hot iron, quickly backing up a few feet while covering her face with a notebook. _“I’msosorryIcouldn’thelpmyselfGemsaren’tsupposedtodiesotherearen’tanyinheavenIhadtotakea-”_

 _“‘Die?’”_ Rose repeated, getting up on her feet and taking a moment to look at herself. Her form no longer had her in a dress, but in a white tuxedo and pants, with a pink dress shirt covering up most of her torso (save for her gem, of course). There was also a pink star brooch on the front of the tuxedo. Not her usual style, but it was certainly classy. She looked back to the woman in white and gold, taking more notice in that ring-no, _halo._ “Is this the afterlife, then?”

The young woman seemed a bit stupefied at first, staring at Rose with disbelief, before blinking a few times and giving a smile. “Oh! Yes! Yes, this is! Sorry, I forgot Gems don’t exactly have a concept for the afterlife, given that they’re...functionally immortal and all…”

Suddenly she was up close, leaning in with her notebook in hand. “How did you die, exactly? If you’re comfortable telling, that is. I mean, even when Gems are _shattered,_ they’re still alive - just...not very coherent. It’s-you can see why I’m curious, right? By all accounts, you shouldn’t be here!”

Rose let out a small chuckle, patting the woman on the shoulder. “That is a _long_ story I think I’ll save for later, miss…?”

“Azazel,” Azazel nodded eagerly, wiping off a bit of sweat that had culminated on her brow. “And don’t call me miss, please. I’m still an angel-in-training, after all…”

Rose nodded, holding out a hand for Azazel to take. “And I’m Rose Quartz.”

“Nice to meet you, Rose!” Azazel grinned, eyes sparkling. “I have to say, when I went down here to work on my demonology thesis, I wasn’t expecting this at all!”

“Well, I certainly wasn’t expecting…” Rose trailed off as she repeated what the angel said in her head. _Demonology._ Craggy red rock. And was that the smell of sulfur in the air?

“...are we in hell?” Rose asked, looking at the angel with slight concern.

“Yes!” Azazel cheerfully answered with all the grace and subtlety of a Diamond hand-ship.

...well.

That seemed about right.

**Author's Note:**

> Most people: Hey, you know what would be fun? A Helltaker crossover where the main character of this media I like interacts with the demon girls! I think I'm going to write that!
> 
> Me: I'm going to do that but with the morally gray character that a good portion of the fandom demonizes and I have never written before :)))
> 
> so this might not have been the best idea to get back into writing fanfiction with but oh well
> 
> I have no idea if I'm going to get back to this (because my track record thus far says I won't) but tell me if you'd like me to I'd appreciate it


End file.
